The second drawer on the children’s dresser broke, no great surprise, it was not well made. Until we can replace it, hopefully with something sturdier. I’ve been trolling craigslist waiting for something to jump out at me. Until then the dresser it is being held together by one of the most powerful forces in the universe, duct tape! It might not be pretty, but it works! Some things my toolbox will never be without.

I was 18 when I moved in with Michael, almost 19 when we had a civil union. If you would have told me then that by the time I was 24 I would have two breastfed co-sleeping cloth-diapered children I would not have believed you. Not that I didn’t want children, I just didn’t want them to come out of my body. I figured someday far down the road that we might adopt. Oh how time changes us…

When I first fell in love with Michael, he was perfect. Handsome and tall with a witty and deep personality. Had you pointed out a flaw to me at that time I would not have believed you. The kind of dad he was going to be was not a pressing issue in my mind when we were wed, nor were his parenting views were. I don’t know if any 18 year old wonder such things about their significant other.

Even when we decided to have our own children, we came up with their names long before we discussed parenting practices. He was actually the one who actually brought up breastfeeding, natural birth, co-sleeping EC and cloth diapering. Heck, I had never even held a baby until Damian was born, much less changed a diaper.

Even the best laid plans have kinks, especially when another life is involved. I was a wave of emotion throughout my pregnancy, when I was 8 months along my employer fired me and I became a stay-at-home mom before Damian even arrived! In that month at home I spent more time wondering what kind of father Michael would be then what kind of mother I would be. When I went into labor I loved Michael ever minute of it, he didn’t even flinch when I threw up (and he does not do well with vomit) and breathed with me during contractions. I loved him even more when Damian finally arrived and I watched him hold so tenderly.

That said, Damian was still a baby at that time, not really doing much other then nursing, pooping and sleeping. I honestly don’t think I really began to understand how great a father Michael is until Damian was crawling. Of course he is great at all that manly dad stuff like tossing Damian in the air, chasing him around the house while making every animal noise in existence, helping him down the slide in the park and reading the same books over and over too. But Michael is also great at all those things you never think about until you are taking care of another life. Diaper changes, late fussy nights, bath times, finding time to buy food… Things that I all to often hear that other dad’s are absent in. Not Michael though, he helps with all those little things, he is better at keeping track of the shopping then I am! And now that Ivy is here, he is still just as involved with her powerful little life force (and at times she is truly a force of nature) as he was with Damian.

I’m not saying he’s perfect, just like I’m not perfect. We have had won, lost and stalemated on our share of arguments. We have even had a couple nights were we have not shared our bed out of frustration with each other. And I don’t think any of that is a bad thing either. Sometimes walls need to be broken down to make room for a more stable foundation that can reach to greater heights. I will never love Michael as I loved him when we first fell in love, and I don’t want to, just as I will not ever love him like I loved him when Damian was born or when Ivy arrived. Our life has changed so much since we first met, we have changed so much.

It is about this moment, right now. I still love him as the person who can make me feel beautiful with just a look and as the handsome devil he is with that witty sense of humor of course. But I also love him in a way that only a mother can love the father of her children. The father who sits up late on the couch as his son fall asleep in his lap. The father who will wear his baby in a sling because they don’t want to be set down and who gets up in the middle of the night to sooth an upset child. The one who goes to work every day so that I can stay home with our children and give them the care we feel they deserve. I can see the love our children have for him and that makes me love him even more.

I know it would be a mistake to believe I will never love him as much as I do now, I thought that when I was 18, but I do love him more then ever in this moment. And that is a beautiful realization.

I had a zombie nightmare last night and it was really scary while I was in it, but kind of funny now that I’m awake. (And no, I haven’t watched any zombie movies for a few months now. Not since Samhain.)

I was in a house that looked like my uncle Stan’s but which had the yard and basement of our current house. It was snowing heavily and I was getting ready for our annual Yule party (which is today in real life.) Andrea called me to let me know she’d be late since zombies were blocking her car, she told me to turn on my tv. When I did they were on screen, in the perspective of looking out Andrea’s eyes. In the dream this made sense as she had just recently received her “Blackberry implant” and was now completely wired.

Peter was dressed in Samurai armor and was throwing pine tree bonsais at the zombies (funny because Peter really does have Samurai armor and has tons of little pine trees in his grow room.) Andrea was throwing turnips (which I need for a recipe, Michael is picking some up on his way home.) Unfortunately neither weapons were ineffective and though they got in their car the zombies pulled them out and ate them (very Night of the Living Dead-ish.)

Frantically I called Shannon, when she picked up she informed me of her similar situation. She was using a snow shovel to knock them down her basement stairs as they came in her back door (so much for her roommate…) Her last words before I heard a snap and gurgling were “but I have a shovel!”

I called Michelle and Mikcos but no one picked up, nor did Michael. In my dream Michael was at work (as he is this morning for a few hours) but I wasn’t worried since they had a zombie shelter. Damian and Ivy were not in my dream (thank you subconscious.) My mom was out with my uncle, so it was just my grandma and grandpa Mason and brother at home. We all fortified ourselves in the basement, armed with canning jars. When the zombies broke threw the door we all screamed “I want my mom!” and started throwing the jars.

Just before I woke up I realized all the zombies had iphone implants…

Weird huh?

“In war, there are no unwounded soldiers.”

Several years ago, maybe when I was still in Spain, I saw this photo somewhere. It is of a soldier cradling an Iraqi child who was wounded in a suicide bombing. Every time I think of war this photo comes to mind instantly no matter what war is being discussed and it twists my heart and stomach into all kinds of knots. It reminds me that war touches everyone, from those who chose to go into harm’s way, through the most helpless who must survive its madness. I don’t need to witness war to have my dreams affected by it’s horror or know that it is ugly and brutal.

I hope that one day humans will reach a point where we no longer think that war is needed to protect peace. I think that the word’s of Eleanor Roosevelt reflect my desire for lasting peace most clearly, “When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?” Unfortunately I know that today is not that day so instead I send love and support to those who have and must endure war, both civilian and military and pray for an end to the violence for all.

We are getting our first frost warnings this week so I have had a chance to start using my GardenQuilt row cover which should protect down to 24F and has 60% light transmission (so I pull it off during the day once it warms up.) I bought a 10′x20′ piece of GardenQuilt and used most of it to cover my winter vegetable garden (my carrots have finally started to grow by the way!) The extra piece will not be large enough to cover the next raised bed I built but I can eventually sew a couple pieces together to make another large piece. For now it is draped over my tomatoes trellis to offer them some kind of frost protection while they finish ripening.

I harvested my first autumn Early Scarlet Globe Radishes this morning, I think they have gotten hotter with the cooler weather. I am definitely ready for this cool down too, anything over 80F has been leaving me drained but I am not sure if I am ready for frost yet. I am hoping my last pumpkin ripens before the killing frost as I don’t have enough row cover to protect it. It is about half way orange. You can see it at the very end of the vine to the left of the tomato trellis.

Does anyone know if there is any way for me to encourage it to hurry up and ripen? I do not intend on storing it for long, it will be turned into a pie in short order. Should it ripen at least.

Those who can their own food might have encountered this little problem. When you place a opened canning jar in the fridge it tends to reseal itself. Not the end of the world of course but I’ve lost more then a few fingernails prying them open each time I want some zucchini relish or peach jam. I also store dried goods in canning jars (like those chocolate chips) and they have a tendency to seal from time to time too. It is amazing that I have fingernails in fact.

When Michael stopped at the store the other week to augment my supply of Kerr jars (my preferred canning jar) he spotted these, plastic storage caps made by Ball (sorry Kerr!) These are for regular sized jar but you can also purchase them for wide mouthed jars. I am not sure how much Michael paid for them at Fred Myer but googling them shows that they seem to cost around $4 for 8. A bit of a frivolous expense in some eyes probably but I appreciate the drop in broken nails enough to justify it. Love them!

Just wanted to share my newest little discovery.

My Grandma Mason recently sent me a couple Countryside magazines from when she was focused on homesteading. I love them, enough so that I am considering subscribing, as the magazine is still around. Even though the information in these two is older then me, I still find it relevant and am amazed by how what is old is new again. (I suppose people say vintage instead of old now don’t they?) For example I recently I read an article about how there are high levels of certain man-made toxics in some women’s breastmilk, showing how toxic we have made our own environment. One of the magazines also had a little article about that, from more then 30 years ago!

Everything that is old is new again… except the prices! A corn kernel cutter for 65¢, seriously? Granted, wages were less back then but I noticed that the price of homesteading books hasn’t changed much, it still ranges between $8 and $20. I also noticed that most of the ads in the magazine do not have phone numbers listed and instead use P.O. Boxes and small order forms. Naturally there are no urls or email addresses! The only color photos are on front and back cover. Most of the images inside, especially in the ads, are hand drawn. I think that is neater then photos.

My grandma teased me in her letter that she was initially going to start sending me the magazines starting them from 1986 (when I was born) but realized that they were all older then me. These two are from October 1977 and May 1978. So far I am still reading the October 1977 issue which is all about storing and preserving your harvest, particularly root cellaring, and explains how to convert a portion of your basement into one. Love the headlines on the May issue’s cover “How to outwit a cow”. Hehe! Maybe cows are smarter then I give them credit for…

Anyhow just wanted to share a little bit of my vintage magazines with you. (On a side note I love that my grandma always puts Mrs before my name on envelopes and I love that she includes handwritten letters. It is so nice receiving something someone took the time to sit down and write nowadays.)

Oh! And those are some tomatoes I picked from my garden this morning in the photo. Clockwise from the top, a Black Krim, two Amish Paste and a few Cherry Romas and Stupice.

We have two of these large spiderwebs on our deck (one in each open corner, but not any where the deck attached to the house.) Each has their own respective spider owner of course. I have no clue what variety of spider they are as I’ve only seen their large orb spider-like silhouettes in their webs at night. As soon as I turn on a light to try to get a better look they vanish. The quick glimpse I have gotten is maybe some black and orange fuzzy stripes? I am fairly certain they are not the yellow garden spiders I sometimes fine in my tomato plants.

The webs are both quite large (thank goodness, not as large as the ones at my parents’ old home in Spain. As much as I like arachnids, 5 foot webs with wrapped things in them large enough to be rodents were a wee bit too creepy for me.) The web in this photo though is just about 2.5 feet across though, probably one of the larger ones I have seen in Eastern Washington. It is strong too, I brushed up against it while sweeping the deck and a broom would normally destroy a spider but all it did was strum it like a guitar. No structural damage at all (though I am sure it’s owner was wondering what was going on.)

While I am not cuddly with arachnids of any form by any stretch of the imagination (though I have a live and let live policy with the couple in the basement pantry that keep the insect invaders at bay) I am not particularly bothered by them either. That is probably why I have largely ignored the deck webs. Surprisingly enough Damian has shown very little interest in them, he ripped them down a couple times but the spiders build them back bigger and better each time. I love the webs though, I think they are so beautiful. Even if you are afraid arachnophobic, I would think it would be hard not to at least admire a spider’s weaving talent. I could never weave something so seemingly delicate and yet so very strong.

Anyhow I just wanted to share my first vaguely successful attempt at photographing one of their webs with you and maybe see if my equally vague description of them rings any bells for any of you. I’d kind of like to know what species they are, just to satisfy my curiosity.

So I received a FedEx package today which I promptly tore into. When I open the box there was a pair of blue eyeballs in a ziplock bag staring up at me and a pair of brown ones beside them.

For the record, I did not order a hit. At least I wouldn’t blog about it…

That’s not all, there also was two roundish wrapped packages in the box. They were skulls. Please cue the dramatic music.

I swear, I have not ordered any hits.

Serious, the package was from my Uncle Stan, who tricks out his yard to the fullest for Halloween and whom I have been talking to about about some of our plans for our yard. Torch baring ghouls, scarecrows, building bodies that stand up to the elements and don’t mold. The usual. I hope everyone has a uncle they can talk to about stuff like that.

Receiving eyes and heads totally makes my day.

Facing a dying nation of moving paper fantasy
Listening for the new told lies
With supreme visions of lonely tunes[...]

Let the sunshine, let the sunshine in
The sunshine in

Maybe I have simply watched Hair and Across the Universe a few too many times but I often feel that I belong in the sixties and seventies. Not just because of the hair, the music and the clothes (though admittedly images do factor into the equation) but also because of the desire to be a part of such a widespread movement of peace, love and not accepting the status quo as truth.

My parents grew up in the “hippy” generation and I wonder if they would find my thoughts on it and romanticized. I wonder if they had as jaded an outlook on their peers as I do? My generation seems so selfish at times, so disconnected from the idea of compassion and too plugged into personal drama. It is hard to have a real conversation with someone anymore without them multitasking a million other things on some electronic device or them thinking that your opinions are a direct assault on them.

Not that I think we are doomed or should ditch our cellphones and laptops and run off to some off the grid commune to live in peace and love. I’m not a luddite (though some might call me one in jest!) nor do I believe in shutting out the world (how then can you fix the injustices?) I do think it is so important to unplug, step back, and consider if we are on the right track sometimes. The world is not going to end if we cannot check facebook, take a walk, or go to the store without our cell phones. I don’t think it would hurt any of us to slow down and appreciate a slow pace in life. I personally think it would make us healthier.

I am curious about what people think of my generation, including my peers. I know we are not all drama-queens and kings where the number of thiings we own and people we use dictate our place in some imaginary popularity contest; but I admit, it feels that way some days.

(Until my new camera arrives my Aunt Ruth has graciously allowed me to use her stunning photos in my posts. Check out her blog and flickr.)

What is forgiveness? The word itself comes from the Latin “perdonare” which means “to give completely, without reservation.” I suppose that is true but that seems to simple for something that is so incredibly difficult. I see forgiveness as the need to untie yourself from that which binds you to an offense that was committed against you. In forgiving we release the feelings that hold sway over up allowing us to shed the emotional baggage can had hold us back.

It is so easy to become tangled in a mess of bitterness and resentment that swells to the point that it becomes hard to even remember how it began. It is sometimes hard to see that forgiveness is not the same as condoning negative behavior, nor is it the a synonym for forgetting. Rather, it is a decision to allowing positive energy hold greater sway in your life, and while forgiveness can ultimately lead to feelings for compassion for the one who hurt you, I think that it is and should be done for self first and foremost.

It is never easy for me to forgive but it is as important to my spiritual practice and wellbeing (two aspects of my life that I see as one) as the practice of compassion. How to I find the capacity to forgive within myself? That normally takes solitude on my part, often I find I have to forgive actions within my own heart before I can find enough positivity to allow myself to pardon another. Oddly enough it is easier for me to find and feel compassion for a person who hurt me long before I find forgiveness.

How about you? Is forgiveness important in your life? Why?

I have an awful headcold so I will blog about camping later, but for now to waste the time till Damian takes his nap. This is a random meme I was tagged for. Bold what’s true. Not tagging anyone, do it if you want. I don’t care.

I am 5′4″ or shorter
I think I’m ugly
I think I am beautiful
I have many scars
I tan easily
I wish my hair was a different color
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color
I have a tattoo
I am self-conscious about my appearance
I have/I’ve had braces
I wear glasses
I’d get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free, scar-free
I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger
I have more than 2 piercings
I have piercings in places besides my ears
I have freckles
I’ve sworn at my parents
My biological parents are together
I have a sibling less than one year old
I want to have kids someday (want more)
I have children
I’ve lost a child
I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation
Disney movies still make me cry
I’ve snorted while laughing
I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried
I’ve glued my hand to something
I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose
I’ve had my pants rip in public
I was born with a disease/impairment (does dyslexia count?)
I’ve had stitches
I’ve broken a bone
I’ve had my tonsils removed
I’ve sat in a doctor’s office with a friend
I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed
I had a serious surgery
I’ve had chicken pox
I’ve driven over 200 miles in one day (Michael drove, I don’t)
I’ve been on a plane
I’ve been to Canada (born there…)
I’ve been to Niagara Falls
I’ve been to Japan
I’ve Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans
I’ve been to Europe (lived there…)
I’ve been to Africa
I’ve been to France (lived there… does France not count as Europe to the meme maker?)
I’ve been lost in my city
I’ve seen a shooting star
I’ve wished on a shooting star
I’ve seen a meteor shower
I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas
I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator
I’ve been to a casino (never gambled though)
I’ve been skydiving
I’ve gone skinny dipping
I’ve played spin the bottle
I’ve crashed a car (I wouldn’t say crashed, it was more the ditch attacking me…)
I’ve been skiing
I’ve been in a play
I’ve met someone in person from the internet (married him too)
I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue
I’ve seen the Northern Lights
I’ve sat on a roof top at night
I’ve played chicken
I’ve played a prank on someone
I’ve ridden in a taxi
I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
I’ve eaten Sushi
I’ve been snowboarding
I’m single
I’m in a relationship
I’m available
I’m engaged
I’m married
I’ve gone on a blind date
I’ve been the dumpee more than the dumper
I miss someone right now
I have a fear of abandonment
I’ve been divorced
I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t
I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did
I’ve kept something from a past relationship
I’ve had a crush on someone of the same gender sex
I’ve kissed a member of the same gender
I’ve had sex with someone of the opposite gender sex
I’ve had sex with someone of the same gender
I’ve had sex with more than one person at the same time
I am a cuddler
I’ve been kissed in the rain
I’ve had sex outdoors
I’ve hugged a stranger
I have kissed a stranger
I have had sex with a stranger
I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t
I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t
I have lied to my parents about where I am
I am keeping a secret from the world
I’ve cheated while playing a game
I’ve cheated on a test
I’ve run a red light
I’ve been suspended from school
I’ve witnessed a crime
I’ve been in a fist fight
I’ve shoplifted
I’ve consumed alcohol
I’ve smoked cigarettes
I’ve smoked pot
I regularly drink
I’ve taken painkillers when I didn’t need them
I’ve been addicted to an illegal substance
I take cough meds when I’m not sick
I can’t swallow pills
I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
I have been diagnosed with depression
I shut others out when I’m depressed
I take anti-depressants
I have an eating disorder
I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it
I’ve hurt myself on purpose
I’m addicted to self harm
I’ve woken up crying
I’m afraid of dying
I hate funerals
I’ve seen someone dying
Someone close to me has attempted suicide
Someone close to me has committed suicide
I can sing well
I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant
I open up to others too easily
I don’t kill bugs
I curse regularly
I sing in the shower
I am a morning person
I paid for my cell phone ring tone
I’m a snob about grammar
I am a sports fanatic
I play with my hair
I have/had “x”s in my screen name
I love being neat
I’ve copied more than 30 CDs in a day
I bake well
My favorite color is either yellow, pink, red or blue
I don’t know how to shoot a gun
I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS
I laugh at my own jokes
I eat fast food weekly
I believe in ghosts
I am online 24/7, even as an away message
I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room
I am really ticklish
I love white chocolate
I bite my nails
I play video games
I’m good at remembering faces
I’m good at remembering names
I’m good at remembering dates
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life

I think that it was very much by accident that I fell in love with cameos. When I was a child, I adored change, especially pennies. My mother use to give me all her pennies and sometimes other small change as long as it was smaller then a quarter. I thought all the coins were just fascinating. (A nice little side effect of that was that I amassed quite the little childhood fortune by the time I was six.) We were back and forth between Canada and North Carolina quite a lot so I had a nice mix of coins. I loved how Lincoln’s head was carved into the penny, and I especially adored a specific kind of Canadian quarter that had a horse on one side. I know I said she didn’t give me quarters, but those were always the exception. (If you are curious, those quarters were minted in 1973 to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.) I still have one in fact. I loved running my fingers over the surface of the coins and feeling all the little bumps, it was just so cool.

At some point I saw some of my grandma’s cameos in one of her jewelry boxes and I thought “Wow, those are even cooler then coins!” Not only where they carved in relief but they were also two-toned, usually white on black. My grandma probably noticed by utter fascination and she gave me my first cameo. It had a gold tone pin setting and was a white on peach carving a lady’s head. It has been years since she gave me my first cameo and I still only have a small handful of them (most of which she gave me) but they are not something I see that often. I is also nice having a small, slow growing collections of fantastic pieces with a story.

The photo in this post shows my favorite cameo and my newest one, both from my grandma. The one on at the bottom is pinned on my jean jacket (possibly my most worn and loved jacket for that matter) and it depicts a mermaid waving next to a merchild blowing a horn, I am fairly sure it is white and blue agate, I received it for Christmas a couple years ago. My grandma sent the other one to me this Easter. I need to find a velvet ribbon to thread it on (it is a choker piece as far as I know.) I love the classic white on black woman’s head cameo. Almost all my others are pins, so it is really nice to add one to my collect that has a different use.

Anyhow I just wanted to share my little interest with you. I don’t meet many people who collect cameos so if you are out there, speak up, (and nice to meet you!)

1. Thou shall giveth everything to me.
2. Thou shall not taketh (it) back from me.
3. I shall throweth wherever I wanteth.
4. Thou shall not covet my stuff.
5. Thou shall feed me.
6. Thou shall clean me (even my poopy bottom.)
7. If you will – I won’t.
8. If you won’t – I will.
9. If you insist – hell will be the abode.
10. The night is mine, the day is mine, you are at the servitude.

So mote it be.

Comment to this post and I will give you 5 subjects/items that I associate you with. Then post this on your blog and elaborate on the subjects given. Link the post to me if you do this meme so that I don’t miss it!

Or if you want, just comment here on five things that you associate with me and I will share my thoughts on what you say. I will only comment on each thing once though, (but I don’t mind if you say something someone else said!)

Zyleeth said:

Family: This is definitely one of the most important aspects in my life, though my definition of family is not necessarily defined by blood relation. In fact I think, for the most part, blood ties are a very shallow reason to want to be around someone. I have friends who are family to me. I don’t need to agree completely ideologically or spiritually with a person for them to be family, but I do need to feel welcomed, respected, and the other person needs to have an open mind.

Intelligence: How flattering! I suppose I do have a decent head on my shoulder. I really like to have a plan and to work through all the possibilities in my mind before executing an important task. That said, I trust my gut a lot of the time when results could fall either way.

Passion: Ice ice baby! Wrong kind of passion? I certainly have a passion for life, I adore this little blue ball of life we are riding around the universe. Greatest rollercoaster ever. I have some topics I am more passionate about then others of course, like homesteading and green living, but I love learning about just about anything. I am passionate about people too, I love meeting new people and hearing their stories. I truly believe we can learn from every experience, good or bad.

Phoenixes: Ah, Zyleeth knows! I adore phoenixes, though my views of them are not necessarily traditional. My avatar is a water phoenix, an blue, silver, orange and gold beauty with trailing tails erupting out of the ocean (or river, or well… not puddles though) dripping with flame and water. A symbol of rebirth from the Earth’s womb of course, as well as a reflection of the more mercurial aspect of my subconscious.

Spirituality: I am an intensely spiritual person, and I tend to view almost all parts of my life as some aspect of my spirituality. I am also a very open person so if people ask I will freely discuss my beliefs. Family, living with respect for to the earth, community and ancestor veneration are probably the most important facets of my spirituality. I do not put much faith in deities, nor do I see them as all powerful, but I do believe in wise spirits and they have my respect. When seeking other like-minded people I tend to connect best with Pagans and other Earth-based spiritualists, but I like that I can find common ground with almost any faith (though they do not necessarily see the same correlations.)

Zuca said:

(He also elaborated on each other items in his comment which he didn’t need to do, but is a pretty cool read.)

Belief: See Zyleeth’s list (spirituality.)

Hard Worker: I love having results, so I guess I am a hard worker, that said, if I do not really want to do something, I really won’t. Like right now, I could be cleaning the kitchen, but I would rather be answering this meme. It is important to kick back and have fun too.

Intelligence: See Zyleeth’s list.

Optimism: Probably one of my most recognizable personality traits is this. I am often the incurable optimist, oddly enough, it is not because I necessarily am inside, but it is because someone has to be, and optimists are in short supply in the world. More often then not it is harder to see the good in people then the bad so it is a personal challenge for me too. Besides I heard optimists live longer.

Stubbornness: I would be lying if I said I was not stubborn, but I’ll pick it over being walked on. Generically speaking people seem to correlate optimism with doormat and think I will be a pushover. Little do they know, mwahahahaha! Seriously though I can become really pigheaded if I do not watch it, especially when I have a new idea.

I have had this song stuck in my head for over a week. It is a remake by Gary Jules (originally a Tears for Fears song) and is used in the movie Donnie Darko. There are several music videos for it on YouTube, I just like this one best (a few make me cry though.) I am constantly humming it to myself or singing it to Damian. Some people might think that since I can strongly relate to the words that I am depressed but I find them oddly uplifting.

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very, very mad world mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me

And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very, very mad world … world
Enlarge your world
Mad world

Just felt like sharing.

Sometimes when I ask Michael how his day at work was he says “It went.” That pretty much sums up life in the Stewart household lately. Michael is feeling under the weather, I’m doing my usual stuff, Damian is his usual self, though he is teething (teething biscuits rock.) He did figure out a brand new baby trick today, he pushed the diaper bag up to the baby gate and tried to use it to give himself a boost across it. 7 1/2 months old and he already has his goals set on escape artist. Having children is an adventure!

I have been working on expanding my knitting skills. My mother-in-law brought by my birthday gift the other day, almost every single thing was orange. My heart sings! Orange cotton yarn, orange dusting cloths, orange glasses and pitcher! As well as a few knitting patterns for washcloths and two books, a cookbook and Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul. I am halfway through one of the washcloths.

I found some really soft (non-orange) yarn while I was looking for my sketchbook today and am tempted to make a baby blanket for Raveness’s upcoming bundle of joy. Who says all baby items have to be in muted pastels (unless she says so. Rule #1: The pregnant woman is always right. Rule #2: If the pregnant woman is wrong refer to Rule #1.)

My father-in-law tagged me for a meme on Facebook today and since he has never done that before, I thought I would oblige. Or try to, coming up with 25 unique factoids about me could take some time.

Rules: read, enjoy, then have a merry day.

OR the Original Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people (more or less) to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you. — choose the rule you like best

1. I love orange. This should be decently obvious by now. I think it is one of the most under-appreciated colors out there. Orange peel is my favorite shade but I love all shades of orange as long as they do not venture to far into the realm of yellow. I also love white and green.
2. I never thought I would like children, much less want one. When I met my husband I knew I wanted children, funny how things can change.
3. I have Seasonal Affective Disorder which is just a fancy term for getting the winter blues. I prefer to say winter blues, it sounds less intimidating. Or SAD because that is the greatest acronym ever. Except maybe for GNU.
4. I also have dsylexia. I reread everything I type 5 or 6 times in a special way I learned in therapy to weed out errors. I still make mistakes of course, but I don’t feel stupid when I do anymore.
5. I would almost exclusively dress in floor length patchwork skirts all the time if I could. Jeans are a lot more practical with a baby though.
6. A lot of people think I am a geek because of all my websites and because I use Linux. In reality I am lucky I can find my way around a keyboard. Michael does all the techie stuff. My unofficial “job” is to break what he creates so that he can find the bugs.
7. I love the way my son smells.
8. After I left home I barely talked to my mother for about for two years. Now we talk regularily and and I think it is fantastic.
9. I am an intensely spiritual realistic and optimist person. It always amazes me when people find those terms to be mutually exclusive.
10. I intend on homeschooling my son and any other children I have. I feel I can do a much better job then the American school system and I am not worried about them being unsocialized since I meet people easily.
11. Except in the case of medical necessity I am strongly opposed to the use of formula. I tend to keep my opinions on it to myself though because I know how easily people get offended and I prefer to avoid arguing.
12. I generally feel that people use too many negatives to define themselves. (I don’t like yellow rather then I love orange.) It seems easier to focus on what we lack rather then what we are grateful for.
13. I try to always speak from a place of wholeness and love. No one was ever ever won over by anger and fear. That said sometimes my mouth goes faster then my mind.
14. I think Damian is starting to try to say Mama, but it might be in my head.
15. For some reason it really annoys some people that I can love without liking.
16. I sing when I am alone. I make up songs constantly.
17. I am learning to read music for the first time in my life as well as how to play instrument (the keyboard.) I wish I had learned as a child, I think it would have been easier, both to learn and find time.
18. I love music that makes me feel and books that make me think. On the flip side I love violent action flicks with little plot, as well as zombie movies. (There are a few exceptions to that though, I love movies with fantastic soundtracks, like A Walk To Remember, City of Angels and Donnie Darko.)
19. I also like M. Night Shyamalan’s movies.
20. I have been a very active dreamer since I was a child. I still remember vivid dreams I had as young as age six. I even sleepwalk, though not since Damian was born.
21. I try to avoid using the verb “to get”, I prefer “to receive” or “to understand”.
22. I am very much a DIY person, from making my own bread and pasta beginning with grinding my own wheat, to learning to knit and sew, I find it much more rewarding to accomplish something like that on my own.
23. I love camping, especially in places where I can see the Milky Way, that would be all the fire I needed if I wasn’t so fond of Michael’s cobbler.
24. Sometimes I feel like my body is too small for my soul. Sometimes I randomly feel filled with this amazing awakening flowing energy that wants to explode out of me in beautiful radiant light. I use to think it was the holy spirit.
25. I respect those who oppose me, they are my greatest teachers.

Last night I had a dream that Raveness (I read her blog over on livejournal) was giving me a tattoo in Greg’s (my father-in-law) office, he has a CPA business. For some reason Greg’s landlord had rented out half of the building to a tattoo parlor. There was a glass wall down the middle. Though Raveness was present through most of the dream, I don’t think we talk about anything substantial. We were talking though.

The tattoo was bizarre to say the least. The central design of the tattoo was encircled by one of my sun designs but it seemed to be shifting around, as if the rays were real. Raveness was just finishing the centeral design when I came into the dream. It was a snake in the form of a waxing crescent moon. It’s tail was the top point of the crescent, the body coiled back and forth to make up the main middle section and the head was the bottom point. It was holding a lantern in its mouth. The tattoo was on my back, behind my manipura chakra (solar plexus.) I mention this chakra because I remember thinking specifically about that in the dream. The snake was a part of that chakra, that thought made more sense in the dream.

At one point I got distracted and when I looked back at the mirror the “moon” was full. The snake was coiled in a circle, head in the middle, it’s eyes made of stars. The eyes were more more then eyes though, they seemed to be holes in me and the stars were inside me, shining through. At the same time, the eyes seemed to be looking at me too. Not sure where the lantern was at this point, maybe outside the sun disk…

Though the dream was black and white, the tattoo seemed to shine like tarnished silver, but it hinted at gold tones too, the same hues as Mexican gold. The whole tattoo seemed to have a life of its own, but it was definitely drawn on my skin.

Michael came by to pick me up. We were living with my mother, or she was living with us, I think the latter. I was trying to figure out how to hide it from her because I was concerned the moving tattoo would freak her out. I also didn’t think she would approve and didn’t want to make any waves. Then in the middle of those thoughts, the roof suddenly collapsed, snow came pouring in (we have had over 60 roof collapsed from snow load around Spokane in the past week, so this isn’t as random as it seems, as it has been on my mind recently.) My brother was standing at the edge of the hole in the roof for some reason and saw my tattoo.

We all got outside safely and he came down from the roof and teasing me that he was going to tell mom. At that point I didn’t really care anymore though. Marko (my boyfriend before I was with Michael) was in the crowd outside, which I noticed only fleetingly then, but seems to be hanging on my mind now that I am awake. My thoughts were drifting at this point between being really pleased with my tattoo and being worried about Greg’s work. Everything felt so surreal.

At some point during these thoughts I woke up.

The Rules:
1. By the Hammer tagged me.
2. Post these rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Six random things about me:

1. Orange is my favorite color, and that is an understatement. I love orange, it makes me smile. The shade I love best? Orange peel I think, but I love all the shades.
2. I have two cats and I love them, but I admit, I am a dog person.
3. I like disaster, post-apocalyptic and zombie movies. It doesn’t need a good plot for me to like it. Michael and I are currently watching Jeremiah on Netflix, very cool. Even Michael needs it, and he needs a plot.
4. I like autobiographies, poetry, philosophy and spiritual books. While I don’t need a purpose in my movies I need it in my books. Though I do like the occasional lusty fantasy novel.
5. I am learning to knit (yes, with orange yarn!)
6. I think I am the only person left in Spokane who likes snow…

Welcome to the Christmas edition of getting to know your friends.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Usually paper, unless I have leftover gift bags from the previous year. I always wanted to get this kind of wrapping paper, it is embedded with wildflower seeds.

2. Real tree or Artificial?
We have a white prelit six-foot artificial tree. We have had a real tree a couple times but I don’t like cleaning up pine needles or figuring out how to dispose of a real tree in the city.

3. When do you put up the tree?
Usually the first week of December we decorate it a few days after.

4. When do you take the tree down?
Between New Years and my birthday (January 9th.)

5. Do you like eggnog?
Yes, with rum!

6. Favorite gift received as a child?
Either my legos mindstorm kit or telescope.

7. Hardest person to buy for?
My husband. Most of the things left that he wants (like a new monitor) are out of my price range. I got him clothes this year (which he picked out.)

8. Easiest person to buy for?
Most people have a hobby or collections or something that you can work off of.

9. Do you have a nativity scene?
No. I celebrate Winter Solstice instead of Christmas.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Mail. I dislike getting email cards, it always ends up putting me on spam lists.

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
No clue… I always enjoy my gifts. Even socks, I love colorful socks.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
A Christmas Story

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
I almost always make my Christmas gifts so I never really shop.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
I have made them out of recycled material…

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
homemade cranberry relish

16. Lights on the tree?
Prelit tree, even better the untangling wires!

17. Favorite Christmas song?
Carol of the Bells

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
Stay Home!

19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer’s?
Dasher, Prancer, Comet, Donner, Blitzed, Pedro, Juan and Bubba
and Dominic the Donkey
and Leeroy the Redneck Reindeer

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
Wicker stars and pinecones.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Winter Solstice Day.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
How crazy people get when shopping.

23. Favorite ornament theme or color?
Silver, gold or clear icicles

24. Favorite for Christmas dinner?
Pot Roast

25. What do you want for Christmas this year?
A dvd teaching me how to knit and needles or one on bellydancing (my goals for the year.)

26. Favorite thing about Christmas?
When I was a child I most looked forward to waking up in the morning and having my stocking at the end of the bed full of neat little stuff and fruit and candy. I miss that. Now I am looking forward to doing that with Damian when he is old enough.

I received my new blender yesterday. My dad treated me to an early Christmas gift and upgrade on my now dead Oster blender. My counter now glows with its latest addition, and orange (tangerine technically) KitchenAid blender.

It is beauuuuutiful, but then my weak spot for all things orange is well documented. Someday I was white and orange kitchen (so it can look like I work inside a orange creamsickle… Yummy.)

The first thing I made? Pumpkin Pie Smoothies of course, an orange blender deserves to be christened with an orange drink (okay the smoothie is a little more reminiscent of baby poo, but the pumpkin was once orange!) I made orange juice after that, perhaps that would have been more suitable a photo…

My kitchen may now return to its regular blender dependent schedule!

…that people ask me about Christmas.

A couple people have asked me recently what I want. I don’t need anything (unless anyone has a couch or futon mattress in decent condition they need taken off their hands.) I know that statement won’t fly with some of my family, so I’ll link you to our wishlist if you want any ideas.

As far as Damian goes, we mainly need winter clothes for him (size 9-12 months.) I don’t mind if they are used (almost all his clothes are second hand) as long as they are in good condition. I never expected him to be fitting in 9-12 months clothes in less then 6 months! Damian does not need anymore stuffed animals (we have half a closet full already.) If you want to get him a toy, I would prefer them not to be plastic. I have a few wooden toys on his wishlist, but I don’t mind if they are second hand either.

I’ve been putting up our tree and cleaning today. I forgot how tedious it is to shape an artificial tree and how ignoring the dishes for a few days makes a scary pile! I love having a tree though… and a clean home. I think I am going to make meatloaf for dinner…

And a baby picture, just because.

If you want to play along just copy this and then bold the things you’ve done.

I HAVE….

1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris (lived there too!)
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France (less than impressed)
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse (solar and lunar)
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie (and extra in a huge crowd)
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma (plasma and blood)
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London (I think so… I was little when we visited.)
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life (maybe?)
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby (yay!)
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

And…
100. Ridden an elephant

90 years ago today the Armistice that ended World War I was signed. (It is where we get the phrase “the eleventh hour” in fact since it was signed on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month.)

Over 20 million people, both military and civilian died and 21 million were wounded. Think about that number for a moment, 41 million people.

• That is more people then in the entire state of California.
• It is more then twice the population of New York State.
• 41 million is 16 times the population of Toronto.

Since World War I, we of course had World War II, the deadliest war in history, over 72 million people – men, women and children, lost their lives. The world has had countless other wars, 5 million died in Vietnam, 5.4 million in the Second Congo War… 4193 Americans have died in the current war in Iraq, over 1,000,000 Iraqis have died, though there are no exact numbers.

I am not saying all this to make an pro or anti-war stance, just think about the numbers for a minute. To me they speak for themselves to the horror of war. I saw a picture of a girl a child who had been raped to death in Africa during the Rwandan genocide in 1994 (where over 800,000 were killed in only 100 days, less then 4 months.) That is one of the faces of war, the kind that haunts one’s dreams for a lifetime. I think it is the face we should remember when we talk about going to war or being in a war, it is not just soldiers’ families who are effected. War effects everyone.

Anyhow, today is Veterans Day. I give my love and support to those who have and must endure war, both civilian and military. The pictures are enough to change me forever, I can’t even begin to imagine what seeing killing like that in person does to someone. I pray for those people, that they might find hope to live through it and peace after.

I usually avoid these types of entries, but Jaspy asked nicely, it’s 6am, and I have nothing better to do… sooooo….

The Rules:

• Go to Music Outfitters.
• Enter the year you were done with high school in the search function and get the list of 100 most popular songs of that year.
• Bold the songs you like, strike through the ones you REALLY dislike.
• I’m adding color to the ones I absolutely adored.
• Tag some people. Not going to happen

1. Lady Marmalade Christina Aguilera, Lil’ Kim, Mya & Pink
2. Fallin’, Alicia Keys
3. I’m Real, Jennifer Lopez
4. Family Affair, Mary J. Blige
5. Butterfly, Crazy Town
6. Thank You, Dido
7. Don’t Tell Me, Madonna
8. He Loves U Not, Dream
9. Gone, ‘N Sync
10. Love Don’t Cost A Thing, Jennifer Lopez
11. Hero, Enrique Iglesias
12. Hanging By A Moment, Lifehouse
13. Drops Of Jupiter, Train
14. Jaded, Aerosmith
15. U Remind Me, Usher
16. Hit ‘Em Up Style, Blu Cantrell
17. Survivor, Destiny’s Child
18. It Wasn’t Me, Shaggy featuring Ricardo “Rikrok” Ducent
19. All For You, Janet Jackson
20. Angel, Shaggy featuring Rayvon
21. Turn Off The Light, Nelly Furtado
22. All Or Nothing, O-Town
23. How You Remind Me, Nickelback
24. Someone To Call My Lover, Janet Jackson
25. Fill Me In, Craig David
26. It’s Been Awhile, Staind
27. I’m Like A Bird, Nelly Furtado
28. Bootylicious, Destiny’s Child
29. Again, Lenny Kravitz
30. Let Me Blow Ya Mind, Eve featuring Gwen Stefani
31. Everywhere, Michelle Branch
32. Stutter, Joe featuring Mystikal
33. Irresistable , Jessica Simpson
34. I Hope You Dance, Lee Ann Womack
35. Nobody Wants To Be Lonely, Ricky Martin & Christina Aguilera
36. Here’s To The Night, Eve 6
37. Beautiful Day, U2
38. Emotion, Destiny’s Child
39. Superman (It’s Not Easy), Five For Fighting
40. Southside, Moby with Gwen Stefani
41. The Space Between, Dave Matthews Band
42. Play, Jennifer Lopez
43. When It’s Over, Sugar Ray
44. Drive, Incubus
45. More Than That, Backstreet Boys
46. What Would You, Do City High
47. Be Like That, 3 Doors Down
48. I Wanna Be Bad, Willa Ford
49. Peaches & Cream , 112
50. Ride Wit Me, Nelly
51. Only Time, Enya
52. Where The Party At, Jagged Edge with Nelly
53. Standing Still, Jewel
54. Pop, ‘N Sync
55. This Is Me, Dream
56. Never Had A Dream Come True, S Club 7
57. Crazy, K-Ci & JoJo
58. You Make Me Sick, Pink
59. What It Feels Like For A Girl, Madonna
60. E.I., Nelly
61. Dig In, Lenny Kravitz
62. Get Ur Freak On, Missy Elliott
63. Breathless, The Corrs
64. Every Other Time, LFO
65. Yellow, Coldplay
66. Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning), Vertical Horizon
67. One Minute Man, Missy Elliott
68. I Do, Toya
69. Fly Away From Here, Aerosmith
70. I’m A Slave 4 U, Britney Spears
71. Smooth Criminal, Alien Ant Farm
72. Still On Your Side, BBMak
73. No More (Baby I’ma Do Right), 3LW
74. My Everything, 98 Degrees
75. Ms. Jackson, Outkast
76. Start The Commotion, The Wiseguys
77. Free, Mya
78. Baby, Come On Over (This Is Our Night), Samantha Mumba
79. Hemmorhage (In My Hands), Fuel
80. Drowning, Backstreet Boys
81. Around The World (La La La…), ATC
82. Thank You For Loving Me, Bon Jovi
83. AM To PM, Christina Milian
84. Izzo (H.O.V.A.), Jay-Z
85. Flavor Of The Week, American Hi-Fi
86. What’s Going On, All Star Tribute
87. Stronger, Britney Spears
88. One More Time, Daft Punk
89. I’m A Believer, Smash Mouth
90. We Fit Together, O-Town
91. Differences, Ginuwine
92. Follow Me, Uncle Kracker
93. There You’ll Be, Faith Hill
94. So In Love With Two, Mikaila
95. In My Pocket, Mandy Moore
96. Mad Season, Matchbox 20
97. Bad Day, Fuel
98. What’s Your Fantasy Ludacris
99. Liquid Dreams, O-Town
100. Babylon, David Gray

The Rules:

• Go to Music Outfitters.
• Enter the year you were done with high school in the search function and get the list of 100 most popular songs of that year.
• Bold the songs you like, strike through the ones you REALLY dislike.
• I’m adding color to the ones I absolutely adored.
• Tag some people.

I haven’t heard a lot of these songs (or at least, they were not memorable) and I also didn’t like a lot of music from my generation, at least not mainstream stuff.

1. The Reason, Hoobastank
2. This Love, Maroon 5
3. Yeah, Usher featuring Ludacris & Lil’ Jon
4. Leave (Get Out), JoJo
5. She Will Be Loved, Maroon 5
6. Pieces Of Me, Ashlee Simpson
7. With You, Jessica Simpson
8. The Way You Move, Outkast
9. My Immortal, Evanescence
10. My Happy Ending, Avril Lavigne
11. My Boo, Usher & Alicia Key
12. Burn, Usher
13. Toxic, Britney Spears
14. If I Ain’t Got You, Alicia Keys
15. Breakaway, Kelly Clarkson
16. Dare You To Move, Switchfoot
17. Dip It Low, Christina Milian
18. Over And Over, Nelly featuring Tim McGraw
19. Hey Mama, Black Eyed Peas
20. Meant To Live, Switchfoot
21. Lose My Breath, Destiny’s Child
22. I Don’t Want To Be, Gavin DeGraw
23. Naughty Girl, Beyoncé Knowles
24. Let’s Get It Started, Black Eyed Peas
25. On The Way Down, Ryan Cabrera
26. I Don’t Want You Back, Eamon
27. Falls On Me, Fuel
28. Roses, Outkast
29. One Thing, Finger Eleven
30. Move Ya Body, Nina Sky
31. I Don’t Wanna Know, Mario Winans featuring Enya & P. Diddy
32. Broken, Seether featuring Amy Lee
33. Everytime, Britney Spears
34. The First Cut Is The Deepest, Sheryl Crow
35. Scandalous, Mis-Teeq
36. The Voice Within, Christina Aguilera
37. Take My Breath Away, Jessica Simpson
38. Turn Me On, Kevin Lyttle
39. Heaven, Los Lonely Boys
40. 1985, Bowling For Soup
41. Ocean Avenue, Yellowcard
42. Don’t Tell Me, Avril Lavigne
43. Confessions Part 2, Usher
44. Milkshake, Kelis
45. Eighth World Wonder, Kimberly Locke
46. Me, Myself And I, Beyoncé Knowles
47. Sunshine, Lil Flip
48. Baby It’s You, JoJo
49. Numb, Linkin Park
50. Goodies, Ciara
51. Welcome To My Life, Simple Plan
52. Drop It Like It’s Hot, Snoop Dogg
53. Come Clean, Hilary Duff
54. My Band, D12 featuring Eminem
55. One Call Away, Chingy
56. Hold On, Good Charlotte
57. Freek-A-Leek, Petey Pablo
58. Daughters, John Mayer
59. Tipsy, J-Kwon
60. Slow Jamz, Twista featuring Kanye West & Jamie Foxx
61. Are You Gonna Be My Girl, Jet
62. Just Lose It, Eminem
63. The Trouble With Love Is, Kelly Clarkson
64. Hotel, Cassidy featuring R. Kelly
65. I Like That, Houston
66. Bounce, Sarah Connor
67. Lady, Lenny Kravitz
68. Slow Motion, Juvenile
69. I Miss You, Blink-182
70. Feelin’ Way Too Damn Good, Nickelback
71. My Place, Nelly
72. Dirt Off Your Shoulder, Jay-Z
73. Vertigo, U2
74. You Don’t Know My Name, Alicia Keys
75. Gigolo, Nick Cannon
76. White Houses, Vanessa Carlton
77. Let’s Go, Trick Daddy
78. You And I Both, Jason Mraz
79. Overnight Celebrity, Twista
80. (I Hate) Everything About You, Three Days Grace
81. Only One, Yellowcard
82. Change Clothes, Jay-Z
83. 100 Years, Five For Fighting
84. Echo, Trapt
85. I’m Still In Love With You, Sean Paul
86. Breaking The Habit, Linkin Park
87. Shadow, Ashlee Simpson
88. What You Waiting For?, Gwen Stefani
89. How Come, D12
90. Slow, Kylie Minogue
91. Some Girls (Dance With Women), JC Chasez
92. Vindicated, Dashboard Confessional
93. God Is A DJ, Pink
94. Lean Back, Terror Squad
95. Accidentally In Love, Counting Crows
96. Just A Little While, Janet Jackson
97. Away From The Sun, 3 Doors Down
98. Angels, Jessica Simpson
99. Locked Up, Akon
100. Not Today, Mary J. Blige featuring Eve

I tag AZ, Autumn, my dad, Ginanne and Jett. (How much do you want to bet I will like more songs from my Dad’s list…)

Isn’t our world amazing?

This photo of a gypsum cave comes from National Geographic (“Crystal Palace” by Neil Shea.) I ran across it this morning and am just in awe. I have a 6 inch tall gypsum pillar on altar and I thought that was big!

Anyhow, I just wanted to share. It is so easy to forget that we are a part of a whole, and that whole is much bigger then us. I find that very beautiful and humbling.

My great grandma and grandma Mason sent this for me. It is sooo soft, I love it.

These are my all time favorite albums, ones I can listen to all the way through, over and over and over. I can’t pick a number one favorite of these since the ones I listen to depend on my mood. Some days I want metal, other days I just want some Floyd. Right now I am listening to Cruel, Crazy Beautiful World.

• Pink Floyd – Dark Side of the Moon (1973) I just realized that this album is over 30 years old, wow. I can’t name a favorite song on it. Concept albums simply must be listened to start to finish. (Preferably at night, on vinyl, and in an altered state.) I almost picked “The Wall” for the record.
• Journey – Escape (1981) Also pre-Jaspenelle birth, only 5 years now though. I didn’t just pick it because “Don’t Stop Believing” has the greatest keyboard riff of all time, though that was a factor. I adore Journey, I like almost ever single one of their songs. They are just awesome and this is the best fruit from their awesome tree. (Did I just say awesome tree? Apparently talking about my favorite bands makes my IQ drop. Oh well!)
• Savuka – Cruel, Crazy Beautiful World (1989) Ahhhh, we have now moved into my lifetime. I was 3 when this one came out. “Dela” rocks my world, and so does every other song on this South African band’s cd. “Dela” was in one of my favorite movies too, George of the Jungle. (Brendan Fraser is one of the few actors I will get fangirly over.)
• Sarah McLachlan – Surfacing (1997) I first heard of Sarah McLachlan when I got the City of Angels soundtrack. (One of my favorite movies as well, funny how that works.) I bought this album last year and I love everything about it. My favorite song is “Building a Mystery.” I love her voice, it gives me chills.
• Nightwish – Century Child (2002) I love metal, I love talented mysterious sexy female songstresses (like Raveness! Did I say that outloud?) Therefor I love Nightwish. (I also love Within Temptation, but I do not think I have ever listened to any of their albums all the way through.) My favorite song on this album though, “Ever Dream.” Except it makes me want to cry. Damn ex-boyfriends wrecking my favorite songs.
• Renfey – Rise (2005) The newest addition to my all time favorites. Another amazing songtress. I am not even sure what category her music falls into other then completely beautiful. I love her songs “Rise” and “Journey.” (Here is a video of her song “Over Occupation.”)

Other albums I love and that deserve an honorable meantion are Chumbawamba’s Tubthumper, Alanis Morissette’s Jagged Little Pill and Nickelback’s Silver Side Up. I also really like Face of a New Day by T. Thorn Coyle, totally Pagan and totally awesome. Anyhow, there is a little peak into my music preferences, I’d love to hear your opinions and what some of your favorites are.

Last night I dreamed:

Aliens were invading the Earth.

One of our friends, who turned out to be a FBI agent, came to our home and told us that they were allergic to urinal tablets and had an aversion to hearing humans read outloud. Several of our friends were over and we all started making wreaths out of urinal tablets, which were then featured on the six-clock news.

The aliens then started going house to house, taking people to a camp. When they came to our townhouse, we all started reading from various books (I actually remember what book I was reading, “The Pagan Book of Living and Dying”.) I had Damian in my lap, hidden under a blanket. The alien left quickly. After he was gone we all went outside and got a car from one of our neighbors. It was more of a cage with wheels actually, he gave it to us.

We drove out to Elk to a friends house with a bomb shelter and hide there for awhile. Eventually the aliens found us and beamed in, taking us to a camp. There we found out that our organic matter was going to be harvested so that the aliens could make new ships. One of the aliens tried to inject one of our friends who turned out to be Cyborg (superhero… ya, no more Smallville for me.) I started reciting from “The End of America: Letter of Warning to a Young Patriot” (a book I actually ordered the other say) since all books were band.

We people in the camp rose up against the aliens and all started reciting passages from books them new from 1984 through the Lord’s Prayer. The aliens started screaming and killing people but we kept speaking.

Then I woke up. Weird dream huh? I woke up thinking there were aliens in the bedroom and about to grab a book and start reading, reality set in pretty fast though and I had to laugh. Urinal tablet allergy?

No more B-movies or politics for me! (Except I am watching a documentary on The Weather Underground at the moment, so that declaration is a little empty.) Alien invasions never go well.

My Auntie Andrea made this for me. I love it!

I had a dream last night that a couple military men came to the door wanting Damian to answer his draft notice. I tried to tell them he was too young (he was only three years old in the dream) but they wanted him anyways. They were holding a gun for him. They had a draft notice for Michael too. I was so angry at the government from taking away the people I love.

I told the soldiers to wait in the kitchen while I got a couple things for Damian. I told them Michael would be home in a few minutes. I took Damian, went upstairs and I called Michael when I was upstairs and told him what was going on. He said “you know what to do.”

I did. I dug a shotgun out of the closet and went downstairs and shot the military men. I dragged their bodies into the garden and put a tarp over them. I went and got Damian from upstairs and we started packing. Michael got home a few minutes later and we loaded the car and started driving to Canada. All the billboards on the way had patriotic and religious slogans and Palin on them. I was so disgusted.

We picked up Michael’s family, who also had to flee since they were the “wrong” kind of Christian (they are LDS) as well as Michelle, Mikcos and Nathan because Nathan had gotten his notice. I woke up when we were getting on the road again.

Very freaky.

Got this from my Dad, added a few at the end from my brother. This was a bit tricky for me because I am one of those people who will try just about anything even if I am not sure what it is.

Bold what you have eaten and strikethrough what you would never eat.

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea – pregnant women drink it
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare – best way to have steak
5. Crocodile (or Alligator)
6. Black pudding – or was it blood sausage?
7. Cheese fondue – YUMMY!
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush – I get it on my pita at Pita Pit
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich – with bananas and honey
14. Aloo gobi – I love exotic vegetarian foods
15. Hot dog from a street cart – Does the sausage I got on a baguette in Porte de Clignancourt count? Granted I have had some form of sausage from street vendors everywhere I’ve been.
16. Epoisses – and I wouldn’t eat it again.
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes – peach, blackberry, dandelion, and probably some others…
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream – gross!
21. Heirloom tomatoes – I just finished dehydrating some the other day.
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn (head cheese) — maybe?
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper – unless there is lots of money involved and milk
27. Dulce de leche – soooo good!
28. Oysters – I’ve even had live ones that move when you squeeze lemon juice on them. Had nightmares about them crawling back out my throat.
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl – one of my favorite warming foods
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar – cigars are NASTY! Cognac should be aged +10 years please.
37. Clotted cream tea – I’ll pass.
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O – I prefer the rum watermelon.
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects – I’m taking it a worm as a kid doesn’t count? How about chocolate covered ants?
43. Phaal – I like spicy but I would rather not practice scorched earth on my taste buds
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whiskey
46. Fugu – my son needs a mother
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut – GROSS, gave me hives too.
50. Sea urchin – would love to try
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi – way too salty
53. Abalone
54. Paneer – I think I’ve had this at an Indian restaurant in Barcelona.
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini – not a fan
58. Beer above 8% ABV – not sure
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips – Nasty. Just give me chocolate chips please.
61. S’mores – campers stable
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin – the clay? Sure, it is used in some herbal remedies.
64. Currywurst – now that just sounds unappealing, and German. Not a big fan of German food.
65. Durian – I would try it but it is not like they import something that reeks that much…
66. Frogs’ legs – I like them, but so small that they are barely worth the effort.
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake – all of the above
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette – I AM NEVER EATING SOUTHERN FOOD AGAIN. UG!
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe – with sugar cube right?
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill – our neighbors son hit a Bambi
76. Baijiu – is this like Everclear?
77. Hostess Fruit Pie – also gave me hives. Kind of like that deep-fried Twinkly. America is weird.
78. Snail – smothered in garlic butter, also yummy
79. Lapsang souchong – this sounds good, I love tea.
80. Bellini, Mimosa, Kir Royale – while camping last week!
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky – craved this when I was pregnant
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant
85. Kobe beef – too expensive
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers – I drink and make herbal remedies, what do you think? Rose, violet, chamomile, echinacea, chive, clover…
89. Horse – possibly?
90. Criollo chocolate – maybe?
91. Spam – I draw the line somewhere
92. Soft shell crab – caught on the North Carolina beach, an exception to the Southern food thing.
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish – another southern exception, whoops!
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor – this sounds good
98. Polenta – I make this!
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee – is this the one I accidentally used once that dad had a fit about?
100. Snake – would love to try

Ones my brother siggusted for the list:

101. Kopi Luwak – little weird but I would try it
102. Casu Marzu – adventuresome eater doesn’t mean insane.
103. Balut – no different then any other meat, I would be a hypocrite if I said no. I think there is an Indian dish made with goat fetus too…
104. Escamoles – cottage cheese ants… no.
105. Lutefisk – sure, probably wouldn’t like it though
106. Dog – why not?
107. Ortolan – it’s illegal anyhow.

My addition/question:

108. Jolt and a Moon Pie: My friend Rodney told me about this when I was a child, it was one of the first things I tried after I moved to the USA. I think the combination should be on some illegal drug list…
109. Corn Drink from Mexican street vendor: It had whole corn in some kind of liquid that I got when I wandered out of church. It was awesome.

Has the LHC destroyed the world yet?

If you follow me on twitter then you know about the imminent destruction of the Earth, due to today’s testing of the Large Hadron Collider. So I want to suggest that everyone take these last hours to appreciate our world that is about to be replaced by a black hole. Perhaps indulge in a geeky drinking game with End of the World Chocolate Cakes^[1]

If our planet doesn’t become to the newest celestial address for a black hole and aliens don’t destroy us for threatening the balance in the universe, I can only hope that we open a dimension to where everything is made of chocolate (rather then something only Bruce Campbell can save us from.)

Oh ya, and don’t forget the music!

Update: The Earth has been destroyed.

One of last night’s dreams:

I was walking over a hill and came upon a medium sized crowd of people. I wandered over to see what was going on and saw a man being crucified, well, kind of. He was tied and nailed to a wooden stake (no crossbeam.) There was the “This is Jesus the King of the Jews” sign over his head in three languages.

I felt horrified watching this happen and felt it was a really cruel practice. I also remember feeling pity for Jesus and the heartless people doing the deed. I saw him as another victim of another church gone wrong.

(At this point I transitioned into a completely seperate dream about sailing and pouring white flowers into the sea, except the sea was a face smiling at me, or something like that.)

I came across a video the other day of modern day people who crucify themselves in the Philippines, so I am thinking that is where this dream’s seed was planted. A wooden stake instead of a cross though? That was a little strange. Jesus meets burning on the stake?

This wouldn’t be my first dream with Jesus but last time he was driving a mustang convertible (my favorite car) with three wingless angels, and that was a few years ago. So, slightly different from this one…

Is it weird that one of my favorite poems was written by someone in the throws of an opium experience? Maybe I am just a fan of very bizarre imagery…

Kubla Khan
Vision in a Dream. A Fragment
(by Samuel Taylor Coleridge)

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.

So twice five miles of fertile ground
With walls and towers were girdled round:
And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;
And here were forests ancient as the hills,
Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.

But oh! that deep romantic chasm which slanted
Down the green hill athwart a cedarn cover!
A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e’er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
And from this chasm, with ceaseless turmoil seething,
As if this earth in fast thick pants were breathing,
A mighty fountain momently was forced:
Amid whose swift half-intermitted burst
Huge fragments vaulted like rebounding hail,
Or chaffy grain beneath the thresher’s flail:
And ‘mid these dancing rocks at once and ever
It flung up momently the sacred river.
Five miles meandering with a mazy motion
Through wood and dale the sacred river ran,
Then reached the caverns measureless to man,
And sank in tumult to a lifeless ocean:
And ‘mid this tumult Kubla heard from far
Ancestral voices prophesying war!

The shadow of the dome of pleasure
Floated midway on the waves;
Where was heard the mingled measure
From the fountain and the caves.
It was a miracle of rare device,
A sunny pleasure-dome with caves of ice!

A damsel with a dulcimer
In a vision once I saw:
It was an Abyssinian maid,
And on her dulcimer she played,
Singing of Mount Abora.
Could I revive within me
Her symphony and song,
To such a deep delight ‘twould win me
That with music loud and long
I would build that dome in air,
That sunny dome! those caves of ice!
And all who heard should see them there,
And all should cry, Beware! Beware!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed
And drunk the milk of Paradise.

I looked up several of my favorite stories and poems this evening and was somewhat amused to find that many of them were written by opium addicts. I am not sure what that says about my subconscious, but I am sure Mr Lacy, my English teacher from high school, would be pleased that I find enjoyment in some of the classics.

Do you have any favorite poems?

Two Phrases That Destroyed American Culture – I ran across this article yesterday and loved it, so I thought I would share.

I also thought I would share some stuff from my weekend::

I made cinnamon rolls from scratch:

They were yummy! Next time I am going to use different icing though, maybe just a milk/sugar glaze.

Michael had to be at work from 4am to 8am on Saturday, so he napped with Damian while I made them:

I made labels for some things in the kitchen:

The olive oil bottle says “Olive Oil (now with extra virgins)” because… well, it just amused me.

I got some new shoes at ShopKo (on clearance and 50% off, so $30 shoes for $3!)

We also picked up my diaphragm from the midwives and bought storage bins for my 25lbs of bread flour and sugar. But you don’t need pictures of those.

I got some reading in.

If you are into herbalism I strongly recommend Family Herbal by Rosemary Gladstar.

Last night be went over to Shannon’s and she gave us some organic produce from her garden, yum! Five cobs of corn, lots of green beans, a couple Anaheim peppers, a cucumber and a few more zucchini! I think I am going to be making zucchini relish with them this time.

I’ll probably be dehydrating some zucchini as well, for future use in pasta sauce and maybe to take camping in a vegetable soup mix.

And to end my sharing post, I wanted to share an amazing speech by Archbishop Tutu! What will happen when the last of our great leaders die? Do we have new ones within our generation? I hope so. (On a slightly amusing note, Archbishop Tutu refers to “ubunto” in his speech, defining it is “the essence of being human.” The Linux distro that I use is also called Ubunto!)

Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test…

NFDS – The Guide

Nature, Foreground, Detail, and Shape

Take The Perception Personality Image Test at HelloQuizzy

While some of my fellow bloggers discuss the controversy surrounding the Beijing Olympics, dams bursting in the Grand Canyon and unrest in the Middle East; I, Jaspenelle Stewart, bring you the real news. One that is near and dear to those of us in the Pacific Northwest.

(Can I get a drum roll?)

Georgia men defend Bigfoot body claims

A pair of Georgia men faced more than a half-hour of skeptical questions from reporters Friday as they defended their claim that they stumbled upon the body of Bigfoot while hiking in a remote North Georgia forest. [Read more...]

So many questions arise that the reporters forgot to ask!

What was one of our bigfoot families doing in Georgia? Did aliens help them move? Damn paparazzi, so hard to get away from. Perhaps the Booteans helped them move. Knowing our bighearted bigfoot, he invited Mothman and the Jersey Devil the housewarming party too. I bet they sat around the campfire smoking bud and drinking Molson and singing Kumbaya.

The biggest question though, how did one of the sasquatch die? So help me if it was one of those trigger happy rednecks shot him! Donchaknow they are endangered?! Send the WWF after them! (…or the WWE for that matter… rednecks might understand that better.)

The truth is out there.

I ran across this postcard on PostSecret:

Does it look like the Valley View Fire to you?

Who all reads my blog? What kind of posts keep you coming back?

Let me know and leave me a link if you have a blog too! (And am I the only one who uses gravatars?)

I was working on putting all the information I have on Lughnasadh together in an understandable order when I ran across this feast blessing. I have always rather liked it but I have no clue what the original source was. Does anyone recognize it?

Now is the Time of the First Harvest,
When the bounties of Nature give of themselves
So that we may survive
O God of the ripening fields, Lord of the Grain,
Grant me the understanding of Sacrifice
As you prepare to deliver yourself
Under the sickle of the Goddess

And journey to the lands of Eternal Summer
O Goddess of the Dark Moon,
Teach me the secrets of rebirth
as the Sun loses its strength and the nights grow cold.

I partake of the First Harvest,
Mixing its energies with mine
That I may continue my quest
For the starry wisdom of Perfection
O Lady of the Moon and Lord of the Sun,
before Whom the Stars halt their courses,
I offer my thanks
For the continuing Fertility of the Earth.
May the nodding grain loose its seeds
To be buried in the Mother’s breast
Ensuring Rebirth in the Warmth of next Spring.

[EDIT: A commenter informed me that it originally appeared in "Wicca, A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner" by Scott Cunningham.]

My dad will be arriving in Spokane to visit on Lughnasadh, hopefully we won’t scare him too much, hehe.

Some people have asked me if I will be raising Damian in my spiritual path, the answer is yes and no. I have no desire to hide my spirituality with him or exclude him from the traditions Michael and I have formed (such as celebrating the sabbats.) I think family traditions are important and give a child memories to look back on later in life, much the way I fondly look back on Christmas and Easter now.

This will be his first Lughnasadh and he will be present for our celebration of course. As he grows I will explain as much of our beliefs to him as I feel he is ready to absorb. I also intend on teaching him other belief systems as well, and ultimately the choice if what he wishes to practice is his. There is no such thing as too much knowledge. When he is older, if he chooses to continue to follow my path, so be it, if he is called to another, so be it.

I’ve been doing a lot of these lately, mostly it is something I can do with one hand while I nurse. Let me know if you do it.

[ ] the dark
[ ] staying single forever
[x] being a parent
[ ] giving birth
[ ] being myself in front of others
[ ] open spaces
[x] closed spaces (only man-made ones, I am totally cool with caves and such)
[ ] heights
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] fish
[ ] spiders
[ ] flowers or other plants

Total so far: 2

[ ] being touched
[ ] fire
[x] deep water
[ ] snakes
[ ] silk
[ ] the ocean
[ ] failure
[ ] success
[ ] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] my boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s dad
[ ] boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s mom
[ ] rats
[ ] jumping from high places
[ ] snow

Total so far: 3

[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[x] crossing hanging bridges
[ ] death
[x] heaven
[ ] being robbed
[ ] falling
[ ] clowns
[ ] dolls
[ ] large crowds of people
[ ] men
[ ] women
[x] having great responsibilities
[ ] doctors, including dentists
[ ] tornadoes

Total so far: 6

[ ] hurricanes
[ ] incurable diseases
[ ] sharks
[ ] Friday the 13th
[ ] ghosts
[ ] poverty
[ ] Halloween
[ ] school
[ ] trains
[ ] odd numbers
[ ] even numbers
[ ] being alone
[ ] becoming blind
[x] becoming deaf
[ ] growing up

Total so far: 7

[ ] creepy noises in the night
[ ] bee stings
[x] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[ ] needles
[ ] blood
[ ] dinosaurs
[ ] the welcome mat
[ ] high speed
[ ] throwing up
[ ] falling in love
[ ] super secrets

Final Total: 8

… if you wish to post this in your journal, it’s been requested that you title it “I’m afraid of __ out of 72 common fears”

If you get more than 30, I strongly recommend some counseling.
If you get more than 20, you’re paranoid.
If you get 10-20, you are normal.
If you get 10 or less, you’re fearless.
People who don’t have any are liars

I am off bedrest today so Michael, Damian and I are going to go for a little walk shortly. My boys are napping at the moment though so meme time:

IF you came to my house…

You would see:
A clean downstairs! Michael has done such a great job of keeping the townhouse clean since I have been on bedrest. It kinda puts my cleaning skills to shame.

We’d probably feed you:
Pasta salad, I usually have a bowl of that lurking in the fridge in the summer time.

And offer you this to drink:
Ice tea or tap water (I have an issue with buying water…) We might have milk or very vanilla soymilk too.

We’d undoubtedly ask if you’d read:
I’m not sure, I mainly read spiritual autobiographies so probably ones of those. Maybe “In Search of Grace”.

We’d want to play this music for you:
Renfey or some Celticy background music.

We’d want to tell you the latest about:
My son!

We’d probably suggest a game of:
Scattergories or Scrabble

We might show off:
My son?

We might get on the computer and show you:
Photos or a humorous website.

I hope you enjoyed this… If you do it please let me know so I can remember visit! (My brain is a little everywhere lately.)

Oo my boys are up!

I have succumbed to Twitter.

When it was shown to me a couple months ago I saw it as a waste of time. Maybe I still see it that way, but its allure has finally sucked me in (Solitaire has the same effect on me actually.)

If you have an account, add me, I’ll return the favor!

~~~

I am compiling a phone list of people to call after the baby is born. If you want to be called email me your phone number (don’t forget the area code, or the country code if you are out of the US.)

~~~

I am posting this for the potential amusement (or disgust) of my friend with whom I just got off the phone with: Placenta Recipes.

You could totally cut this one with vodka, that might help ride you of the thoughts of your cocktails contents… I dare someone to name that potential mixed drink.

Before anyone gets any weird thoughts – I will not be eating my baby’s placenta.

~~~

I love Tundra.

Street view is now available for Spokane, WA. I love this Google Maps feature, you can basically “drive” around the city and see it as you would looking at the window of a car. This of course does raise some privacy issues but it doesn’t really bother me, though I did see a topless guy in my friend’s yard…

Next time I talk about places in Spokane, I’ll be able to show you where they are.

Here is some stuff in Spokane (and a couple other places):

• Part of our townhouse complex
• Michael’s Work
• Spokane Midwives Birthing Center – this is where I plan on giving birth
• Beechwood Dr, Raleigh, NC – I think I lived here was I was very young
• 57 S 100 E, Bountiful, UT – Michael lived here a few years ago

As far as I know it is only available for the USA right now, though they want to do it for the whole world. I think it is so cool!

I found this one Body, Soul and Spirit. For an online quiz, it is pretty accurate…

You’re the time of day right around sunrise, when the sky is still a pale bluish gray. The streets are empty, and the grass and leaves are a little bit sparkly with dew. You are the sound of a few chirpy birds outside the window. You are quiet, peaceful, and contemplative. If you move slowly, it’s not because you’re lazy ? it’s because you know there’s no reason to rush. You move like a relaxed cat, pausing for deep stretches that make your muscles feel alive. You are long sips of tea or coffee (out of a mug that’s held with both hands) that slowly warm your insides just as the sun is brightening the sky.

~~~

UPDATE:
March 4th – 6am

I might mention when I don’t get enough sleep for now reason and wake up grumpy and as of yet decaffeinated I am twilight. Of course on mornings like this I just want to snap that damn alarm clock plug right out of the wall because on mornings like this is it is bane of my existence.

Your exact moment of the day is always changing, because the sun never sets at exactly the same time. You are the romantic moments just after sunset when it’s still light enough to see your way around outside, and the sky is a blend of reds, pinks, purples, and blues. At this time of day, the light has a special way of making even rundown buildings looks like works of art. You’re like that, too ? you’re always finding beauty and magic in unexpected places. Not only will you wish on the first star you see, somewhere inside, you actually expect that wish to come true.

Have a nice day!

I found this on i am a butterfly…

Four things about me that you may or may not have known, in no particular order.

Four jobs I have had:
1. Bakery Cashier
2. Walmart Sales Floor Associate (aka Stocker)
3. Telemarketer
4. Parking lot Attendant

Four cars I have Owned/Shared:
1. Michael drives and ‘88 Honda Civic.
2. I am sure my dad had a few cars, damned it I know what make or model.
3. …
4. …

Four movies I would watch (or have watched) over again:
1. Little Nicky
2. Princess Bride
3. Wicker Man (1973)
4. Deeply

Four places I have lived:
1. Canada
2. United States
3. France
4. Spain

Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. Morning News
2. Evening News
3. Two and a Half Men
4. Bones

Places I have been abroad:
1. Mexico
2. Italy
3. Germany
4. England

People who email me:
1. Michael
2. Jett
3. People who want to enlarge my penis.
4. People with millions of dollars in Africa.

Four of my favorite foods:
1. Strawberries
2. Pomegranates
3. Tomatoes
4. Whole Wheat Pancakes with Blueberries

Four foods I hate:
1. Eggs
2. Liver
3. Hot Dogs
4. Tempeh

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. In the southern hemisphere (it is late summer their right?)
2. Somewhere where pregnant women have unsquishable bladders.
3. In a cottage in the woods with a roaring fire and smores.
4. Endless Strawberries and Whipped Cream Land?

Things I am looking forward to this year:
1. Being a mommy!
2. My friend’s handfasting
3. Temple Free Spirit gatherings
4. Living, Loving and Learning

1) Answer the questions below
2) Take each answer and type it into Photobucket (I used Google Images)
3) Take any picture from the first page of results and post. (click on the picture and copy the HTML code)
4) You can’t copy the persons answers who posted this before you!

(I actually will write something cerebral tomorrow… really!)

1. The age you will be on your next birthday?

2. A place you’d like to travel?

3. Your favorite place?

4. Your favorite object?

5. Your favorite food?

6. Your favorite animal?

7. Your favorite color?

8. The town in which you were born?

9. The town in which you live?

10. The name of a past pet?

11. The first name of a past love?

12. Your nickname/screen name?

13. Your middle name?

15. A bad habit of yours?

16. Your first job?

17. Your grandmother’s name?