“I hope she falls, breaks her neck, becomes bedridden, gains hundreds of pounds, dies alone and burns in Hell.” — from my last entry
Wow, I can get pretty specific when I am upset can’t I? But you know what, that woman is not worth that much of my energy mental energy when I have so many wonderful things to focus on.
Today is beautiful and I am beautiful.
A woman said something to me when I was at the park with Damian this morning that really hurt. I was sitting down for a minute to catch my breath after a Braxton Hicks (false contraction) and some woman just came up to me and informed me that I should get up and chase him around to loose “all that extra weight you’re packing and set a healthy example.”
Maybe I just look fat rather then pregnant in the Winter coat but that is no reason for her to have said that! I am measuring exactly where I am suppose to for this pregnancy. How is what she said even remotely helpful? Was it suppose to motivating? So bizarre form of tough love? Was she just trying to randomly hurt the feelings of a stranger? She succeeded in that last one.
I don’t understand how people can be so heartless, I’ve never had someone be so out-of-the-blue cruel to me before. I was having such a shitty morning and went to the park because it makes me feel better and I feel she stole that from me, and I let her. I’m angry that I feel this way and that the only thing I could sputter out was “What the hell is wrong with you?” and she shrugged smiled and walked off, and I let her. I should have grabbed her and slapped her smug bitchy face, I should have stayed in the park rather then coming home and crying.
I hope she falls, breaks her neck, becomes bedridden, gains hundreds of pounds, dies alone and burns in Hell. And no, I can’t even find it in me to feel sorry for her right. I just… I’m so upset. I miss my mom, she would have killed her with a look.
Rain is in the forecast for the rest of this week, but I can’t complain – at least it is not snow! Last week we had some record lows. We normally do not drop into the teens until January here and all the local grower were scrambling to get their harvests in, especially the apples. The temperatures put my new row cover to the test as it is only rated down to 24°F and we had a few nights that got down to 19°F, it seemed to hold it’s own though. Carrots, radishes and one of my kale seem to have survived, something ate my other kale though. We will see how stuff grows from here on out as this year’s Winter bed went in late and is admittedly a bit of an experiment as I’ve never had one before.
Damian demands time outside ever day and in spite of the little cough he is developing, today was no different. After bundling him up and tucking him into his raincoat, out we went. I think he was vastly impressed by the amount of slimy things he was able to locate around the yard. If it doesn’t rain through this weekend I want to finish tidying up the yard. I feel like the weather has been a little crazy this year, no Spring to speak of, sweltering and bone dry Summer, record breaking early cold and hard frosts. If anything this rain is as close to normal as we have gotten.
Halloween is coming up fast, just 15 days away. I would like to finish Damian’s costume this weekend. Once the 31st passes, there will be just a month until my due date and Ivy could come at 38 weeks like Damian too, so maybe less. Two weeks before that my friend is having a Blessingway for me, I am very much looking forward to that! Before then though we want to finish getting everything we need for the birth ready, as well as pack the emergency bag should I need to go to the hospital – back up plans are always a good thing.
